[1] NASHVILLE, Tenn. (BP)–While many Christians celebrate Christ’s birth with the joy of the ideal happy holidays, crisis needs for others make the season seem more desperate than usual, according to writers for the Winter 1997-1998 issue of “Caregiving,” a resource for Christian ministry published by the Southern Baptist Convention’s Sunday School Board.
The crisis for some may be a disaster such as losing a home to fire. Others struggle with Christmas divided between divorced parents. Emotions related to loss and grief are intensified. Financial stress and emotional depression are byproducts of the holidays for significant numbers of people.
Yet in all these circumstances are opportunities for ministry, writers emphasize. Assessing and understanding the loss are key needs in determining how to respond, and those who hurt may need care at times other than at Christmas.
“Often we reach out during the traditional holiday season because we are more aware of the suffering and loss experienced at that time,” writes Terry Lynn Ray, a nurse from Little Rock, Ark. “However, care needs to be extended on any of the holidays that may have special significance for the individuals who have experienced loss or trauma of some kind.”
Don Aycock, pastor of McLean Baptist Church, Memphis, Tenn., observes while memories can be good and also painful, “the future can be scary and uncertain” for those who have had a loss. He provides guidance for understanding one’s changing situation, uniting with others in similar circumstances, reaching out to those in need and evolving with the times.
In an article on Christmas Season Depression Syndrome, an authority on psychosocial care observes “hauling out discussions of the Christmas depression syndrome has become, in the United States, an annual Christmas custom somewhat like hauling out the decorations, singing carols and putting on Santa Claus suits.”
Richard Dayringer of Southern Illinois University maintains that an understanding of the syndrome is good because it “gives people permission not to feel euphoric throughout the season, the way that other Christmas customs suggest they are supposed to feel.”
Dayringer discusses the biological, psychological and social categories of “holiday blues” as well as the ways in which pastors and pastoral counselors can minister to the depressed.
While every year there are people who face a first Christmas without a family member, Cos Davis urges readers to remember children in such circumstances. An educational specialist and pastoral counselor from Franklin, Tenn., Davis observes parents can be “so absorbed in their own grief that their child is not encouraged to deal with the pain the loss has caused … . As with adults, the depth of the sense of loss has to do with the sense of security and personal importance the person or object has to the child.” He offers suggestions for dealing with children, as well as questions to consider in deciding how to help a particular child.
Financial stress can come due to the loss of a job, mismanagement, inadequate income, unexpected expenses or expensive taste, Jimmie Sheffield suggests. Truths related to money, self-worth, attaining love and respect and indulgences can serve as guiding principles for coping with financial stress.
Sheffield, associate executive director of the Arkansas Baptist State Convention, Little Rock, also offers practical suggestions: develop a preholiday budget, give your time in service instead of tangible gifts, make gifts, shop creatively, use the barter system and, if necessary, get a second job to meet a specific need.
“Counseling people in financial crisis during the holiday season can prove to be intense and highly emotional,” Sheffield notes. Providing such a service is a challenge, he agrees, adding “that’s one thing your church members want — practical help to alleviate tremendous pressure.”
Greg Jackson, minister of education at First Baptist Church, Bolivar, Mo., discusses the shock, numbness, fear and embarrassment that can follow loss of a home due to fire. Suggestions for meeting special needs also come out of Jackson’s personal experience in losing a home.
Two fears grew out of the Jackson family’s experience with a house fire, he observed: Everyone becomes more conscious of belongings and more aware of mortality. Among other topics in the issue are the value of a Christmas toy store as a ministry of cheer, finding hope for the new year and caregiving through love-in-action projects.
Caregiving is a quarterly resource designed to help pastors, church staff, chaplains, counselors and others in performing pastoral care ministry and is available on the dated resources order form. Individual copies and annual subscriptions may be obtained through the Customer Service Center, 127 Ninth Avenue, North, Nashville, TN 37234.
Caregiving is a quarterly resource designed to help pastors, church staff, chaplains, counselors and others in performing pastoral care ministry and is available on the dated resources order form. Individual copies and annual subscriptions may be obtained through the Customer Service Center by its toll-free line, 1-800-458-2772, or by writing 127 Ninth Avenue, North, Nashville, TN 37234.