ORLANDO, Fla. – “I would say for him, we have nothing but forgiveness … love … a hope that his life has a better quality and one day he’ll come to know Jesus.”
In a courtroom April 22, speaking to Judge Leticia Marques about the man who murdered his wife, Bill Curl, pastoral care minister at First Orlando, was resolute in his message.
With his voice sometimes breaking, but with no hesitation, Pastor Curl pronounced forgiveness for the man who brutally attacked his wife of 64 years, Lucy Pat Curl, in their home Jan. 31, leading to her death Feb. 5 from the massive injuries inflicted on the 85-year-old woman.
Seated just feet away from Curl family members, defendant Ronald Davis pleaded guilty to the crime and was sentenced to life in prison.
Moved by Pastor Curl’s message of forgiveness, Judge Marques also had a message for the defendant.
“Mr. Davis, I rarely see grace in this courtroom but I saw it today from Rev. Curl,” she told Davis. “You can thank him for this.”
In a quiet, almost imperceptible voice, Davis uttered, “Thanks.”
Following the hearing, the minister told reporters, “He knows what he did; he obviously should be punished for what he did. But that doesn’t negate forgiveness.”
‘Doing what God says’
For Pastor Curl, the gift of forgiveness to the person who murdered his wife was a matter of “surrendering to God’s Holy Spirit and doing what God says.”
Christians, he said, make a “commitment to live life Jesus’ way. We cannot pick and choose what He will be Lord over in our lives. I don’t have any other choice if I’m going to be obedient to the Holy Spirit when something like this comes up.”
He admits that such forgiveness isn’t easy, but holding back such forgiveness, he said, is “a slippery slope, leading to bitterness and anger.
“I don’t want my life ruined by someone else. Why let him ruin my life just because he took the most precious person on this earth from me? I can’t spend the rest of my life letting him ruin my life, but I will if I can’t find forgiveness.”
He also prays that the man who murdered his wife will become a Christian.
Partners in life and ministry
For Pastor Curl and his wife, “living life Jesus’ way” meant serving in Christian ministry together for more than 50 years. The couple served 18 years as International Mission Board missionaries in England and Wales, and served at First Orlando before and after their international missionary service.
Lucy Pat Curl was a mother to four, grandmother to 11, plus one deceased granddaughter, and great grandmother to six. She was a gifted musician and “loved to use music to serve God,” said Pastor Curl. Recently, as she underwent cancer treatment, she would arrive at the cancer treatment center 30 minutes before her appointment, just to encourage other cancer patients by playing music on a piano there.
In his pastoral role at First Orlando, Pastor Curl walked with many people through their journeys of grief, with his wife often playing the piano at funerals. They were a ministry team, praying and reading Scripture together each evening. When the couple would promise often to pray for people, Lucy Pat Curl would quietly clasp her hands together, a reminder to her husband to stop and pray on the spot, even if they “were in the middle of the street,” he said.
“I had 64 years with a Proverbs 31 lady.”
With his beloved wife now gone, Pastor Curl reminds himself, “God holds the future. He still loves me in spite of the fact that He let this happen. I don’t understand why, but He still has a wonderful plan for my life.”
After a brief pause, the grieving husband added, “God’s going to have to answer some questions for me, but He will. He will indeed.”
He realizes he is “not the first one to have bad things happen,” referencing, among others, Joseph in Scripture who was betrayed by his brothers but ultimately offered forgiveness to them.
“To sin is human; to forgive, divine. This sin is not unforgivable.
“The reason I can forgive is because I’ve been forgiven. If God did it for me, then how in the world could I not do it for someone like Ronald Davis?”
‘Expect nothing less’
Admitting that he still tears up regularly, which he describes as “tears of cleansing to help me get through the day,” Pastor Curl also acknowledged that forgiveness of someone who has so grievously hurt you is not a “one and done” action.
There are many days when he has to voice the words, “God, I forgive Ronald Davis.”
It’s something,” he said, “I think I’ll have to keep doing. It’s a lifestyle.”
And it’s something he saw practiced by his wife. “I never heard her say, ‘I will never forgive that person.’”
The “bottom line” of forgiveness, he explained, is that “you’re showing others what Jesus looks like,” stating that, on the cross, Jesus asked God to forgive those who were crucifying Him.
“You can forgive even the most terrible thing that can happen in your life.”
Each day as Pastor Curl puts one foot in front of the other, moving forward without his wife by his side, he reminds himself that the Scripture clearly teaches that God calls His people to forgive.
“And Lucy Pat would expect nothing less from me.”
The article was first published at the Florida Baptist Witness.
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