
Parents, our kids may not be physical captives in Babylon, but they are captives to whatever is captivating them. And that presents a serious challenge for discipleship.
From immersive gaming to endless funny videos, the competition for their attention is fierce. If you’ve ever spent 15 minutes yelling, “Dinner is ready!” while your child is glued to a screen, you know exactly what I mean.
I’ve lost count of how many parents have told me, “My kid is generally respectful – except when I interrupt their screen time. That’s when the attitude, sass or meltdown happens.”
Now, add to this digital environment the God-given responsibility of Christian parents: to ground their children in a faith built on a book written centuries ago and to raise them in the local church. That’s a tough assignment. And no matter how hard we try, nothing we offer will be as visually captivating as what’s on their screens.
So, what happens when your child – because of the very devices we provide – pushes back against going to church?
I need to be honest: I struggle to have empathy when parents tell me they beg their kids to do things. As parents, you are in charge. That said, I know every child’s temperament and experiences are different, and that affects parenting strategies. But here are a few suggestions for those who find this battle especially difficult:
- Don’t make church a choice. If kids think obeying their parents is optional in elementary school, it won’t get easier in middle or high school. But if you’re giving them the choice, set clear boundaries: “If you stay home, you will not be on devices while church is happening. No Fortnite. No YouTube. No online time.” For those who worry about making it mandatory. You should know that for every empty nester that says they regret making church mandatory, I can find 100 who regret that they didn’t.
- Teach them that defiance, backtalk and meltdowns over screen time are not acceptable. Parents have a God-given responsibility to raise their children in the faith. We can’t let the constant pull of digital entertainment be the deciding factor in whether they follow our direction. If they can’t submit to their parents’ leadership, it may be time to cut back on screen time until they can.
- Go with them. Children’s ministry leaders work hard to make church engaging and meaningful – it’s not root canal. But to a kid who spends 20-25 hours a week on devices, anything that requires patience or focus feels painful. If they claim, “It’s boring” or “I don’t have friends there,” don’t just take their word for it – see for yourself. Stay and observe. Engage.
- Build “off-screen” habits at home. Help your kids get used to off times in a way that doesn’t exasperate them. Reading a devotional, slowing down, and being present isn’t just spiritually beneficial – it’s essential for their mental health. Their minds weren’t designed to be in a constant state of dopamine overload.
Parents, let’s be intentional. Our kids will be captivated by something. Let’s make sure it’s not just the fleeting distractions of a digital world but the eternal truths that can truly shape their lives.